Quick someone give me a bottle of xanax. It's the holidays!

Oh the holidays! Full of stupid people in stores acting like assholes, awkward family dinners because everyone has that relative that you can't stand (admit it, you instantly thought of at least one when I said that) and wandering aimlessly through stores because you have NO IDEA what to get people.

Perhaps, I should stay moderately drunk this next two months. Or if I could just get my hands on a bottle of xanax I could smile my way through this mess. I used to love Christmas time, but now it's painfully obvious I am no longer close to my family as I once was. I don't want to carry on traditions with them. I want to start new ones with the people that are good to me all year. I don't want to fake it anymore with people that don't get me. Just because we are related, doesn't make us family. Right?

Am I truly obligated to make things right with these people? I have been blessed with loved ones that make me laugh and like me for who I am, not what they want me to be. These loved ones don't share my genes, but they are more "family" to me than anyone.

The other day, while driving to my parents house:

Me: "This is how I hold my fist as I punch someone, right?."

My lover: Glances over with a raised eyebrow. " You planning on hitting someone?"

Me: " Given the location we are headed, anything is possible."

My lover: "See, that's why I love you. You always keep it interesting."

I don't think I want to celebrate Jesus' birthday with people I feel like punching. I am pretty sure "Tis the Season" has a different meaning.

To those that make me laugh daily, and get my sarcastic irreverent sense of humor: I am very thankful for you and I appreciate everything about you! Even the fucked up shit. Actually it's because of that, that I love you so much.

Happy Holidays Bitches!